3.15 Dead End

Moonlight falls on a quiet campus, where the only signs of activity are the late-night lights of the monolithic houses on frat row. A gaggle of unpledged hopefuls weave their way drunkenly back to their dorms from a very successful party, warmed by the bug juice and the promises of acceptance in the fall.

The camera pans up to a tall tree that graces the side of one of the walkways through campus. Perched in the tree like overgrown owls (or bats) are the silhouettes of four vampires. They look down at the staggering herd. And get ready for a late night snack.

As soon as the group approaches, the vampires leap out of the tree. They make quick work of the group of coeds. One of the guys manages to run for it, and takes off for the other side of campus. One of the vamps, Raven, quickly catches up with him. As she finishes draining him dry, the body slumps down against a campus kiosk, knocking off an assortment of freshly-placed fliers.

One of the fliers catches Raven's eye. In bold letters, it reads "SHAMAN: THE MAGIC AND THE MYTH". It is for a new museum exhibit that is sponsored by the Phillipi Department of Anthropology. Raven's dark eyes sparkle murderously as she mutters about the subjugation of her people, and she pockets the slip of paper.

The group makes it back to their lair just before dawn. The four of them – Raven (the weirdly intense Native American girl), Markus (the wanna-be goth with delusions of grandeur), Candy (the air-headed bombshell in chronic sexual overdrive) and Colin (the undead REI poster child and resident muscle-head) – all live together in an abandoned warehouse with blacked-out windows and a loft not far from Curas, the resident demon watering hole. It isn't horrible, but it's not an elegant place, either.

The vampires throw themselves back on the worn furniture. Conversation turns to The Alumni with a mixture of admiration and disdain. They'd all give anything to be affiliated with them, since The Alumni runs this town, even though the four wannabes have no respect for the idea of being somehow "beholden" to an organization.

Suddenly, a voice descends on them from the darkness of the loft. "Good morning, kids. You've been out past your bedtime ..."

The "kids" crane their necks skyward as a figure emerges from the shadows. The vampire is the picture of badass-ness. Black trench, perfectly aggressive haircut, stylish but versatile footwear (perfect for both formal parties and chasing victims), hints of goth-ness – enough to look cool but not so much as to look stupid.

"Greetings from The Alumni."

"We've been watching you for some time now, and I must say that despite your ... limited resources," he looks around the room with a bit of a sneer, "you have become a fairly efficient gang of vampires. We have a large event coming up, which has demanded the full attentions and efforts of every Alumni. However, an opportunity has presented itself which bears some exploration, and we do not have the personnel to spare. I was charged with finding a gang of non-Alumni who might have the skills and organization necessary to complete this assignment. Would you be willing to do The Alumni a favor?"

The four vamps make noncommittal noises, but The Badass One has their attention.

"There is an event taking place in the Native American Museum Ð a collaboration with the Phillipi Department of Anthropology." He tosses them a flyer, identical to the one Raven found on campus. "It involves some relics which may prove useful to the Alumni. Some of these items have been rumored to possess great magic – some even think that there may be an anti-slayer item in there. The museum event opens today. Find out what you can about the relics. Break in and take whatever you feel might be useful. We don't want anything that isn't useful, and you get no rewards for old worthless junk. Give us what you find, and you will be rewarded."

When asked what they get out of the equation, the vampire replies, "You would have the eternal gratitude of the Alumni, and will be granted special dispensations in the time to come. I cannot go into further detail of what that is, sorry."

The vampires act unimpressed.

"Not good enough? Ah, the upstart attitude. I had that once. Not long ago, in fact." He smiles a little. "Well, I have instructions directly from Dr. Bannon himself that if you complete this task, he may deem you worthy to become one of us. An Alumni. I know there are rules about initiation which have been followed for centuries now, but you will soon find that many rules are breaking these days, and more to follow. You can go to bed tonight in the flats and wake up tomorrow in the hamptons. Or, you can stay here, and continue your existence, such as it is. So? The Alumni need you, and if you succeed you can become one of us. What do you say?"

Well. With a deal like THAT, there's not much the crew can say except "yes". So that's what they do. Satisfied, the Alumni vamp tells the group not to bother trying to contact them – The Alumni will find the quartet when they want them – and he disappears back into the shadows.

After sending Candy up to the loft to make sure their "guest" has departed, the four vamps start making a plan. They decide to case the museum during the day today to figure out which relics are actually of value so they don't waste precious nighttime hours browsing the collection. Luckily, Maine is still chilly in April, so they bundle up in gloves, hats, coats, and scarves and brave the perilous sunlight. A few of them have clumsy moments and get burns for their trouble. They scrape together enough spare change from their past victims to pay for admission, and enter the collection.

The display of Native American artifacts is surprisingly large. Most of the items are behind glass, and are grouped roughly according to theme. The collection once belonged to Dr. Archibald Wallace, a noted expert in Shamanism. The group disburses and starts scanning the area. Further back in the exhibit are four giant totem poles and a squat, painted rock under glass. These are clearly the most valued items in the collection. The stone is 1500 years old, weighs 500 pounds, and is covered with the best preserved paintings of their kind. The most dominant depicts a creature, part man part animal, wielding a flail before his enemies. The card on the rock discusses the basics of totems, and explains that according to Wallace's dictation (he had a rare disease that left him unable to write), this particular one had a special purpose -- to defeat a mystical being called "The Slayer". Bingo.

Having found what they were looking for, the vampires round up Candy (who was about to seduce and then snack on one of the curators) and make for home, to wait until cover of darkness.

At midnight, the vampires head back to the museum. They smash the glass door and walk in. The alarm starts screaming at the night. Not wasting time, the foursome makes straight for the totem. Colin gives a roundhouse kick to the display case, shattering it easily. He picks up the totem -- at 500 pounds, it is heavy even for him -- and starts lugging it back towards the entrance. Raven is unable to resist the collection of peace pipes and snags a few of them as well.

Halfway back to the front door, the police arrive.